Lesson Learned 2p! Hetalia Oneshot
by 123Charisma321
Summary: Allen learns a very important lesson... (I don't own Hetalia, nor do I own the idea of 2p! Hetalia, just the plot)


Another meeting in the 2p universe. But something was wrong. Sweet, kind, would-never-hurt-a-fly Oliver was not in the mood for this meeting. He sat quietly in his chair shadowed blue eyes glaring at the table with rings of candy pink circling in them. He didn't move, not even when someone yelled out a curse word. Nobody has noticed the deadly feeling emitting from the usually bubbly brit. It was until Luciano looked over to him that all hell broke loose.

Luciano's eyes scanned the chaotic room. There was something missing, but he couldn't figure it out. He searched the room for answers until his eyes meet the normally kind brit's crazed ones. Luciano took in a deep breath. Shit, shit, _shit_. If Oliver was in a bad mood, he'd rather not eat his cupcakes today.

Oliver was the best cook around and loved to bake, especially cupcakes, but when the brit was in a bad mood he had a habit of poisoning his cupcakes and giving them to unsuspecting people, he enjoyed watching them struggle in pain on the ground. It was common knowledge that Oliver didn't kill people unless absolutely necessary, but at a time like this, Oliver was more deadly than Luciano himself.

Oliver smirked at Luciano when he sensed the Italian's uneasiness. He'd had a bad week and today's meeting was starting to annoy him, why not have a bit of _fun~_?

" _Francois~?"_ the brit purred in his French friends(-ish?) ear.

Said man tensed, finally noticing the deadly tone the sweet man had, "Oui, Oliver?" his uneasiness doubled when the brit's deranged eyes met his.

"Would you like a _cupcake~_?" Oliver questioned holding out an innocent looking cupcake with a false smile.

Francois hesitated, he wouldn't poison him with everyone watching, would he? Oliver opened his eyes slightly to glared at his companion. Francois uncharacteristically gulped and took the cupcake, taking a bite. He swallowed. And waited.

One second…

Two seconds…

Three seconds…

Four…

Nothing happened. He deemed it safe to eat the cupcake and finished it. Oliver gave him a pure smile and turned back the right way in his chair. Francois signed quietly in relief started to violently cough.

Everyone turned to him as they stopped what they were doing, wondering what was going on. Francois started spitting up the blood that was raising up his throat. He looked to Oliver to see him grin as another ring appeared in the blue of his eyes. Francois fell from his chair as everyone stared in shock, not understanding what was happening. Luciano suddenly stood up and pulled out a knife. Others look at him in confusion.

"What the fuck are you doing, Luciano?" Kuro asked, should they help Francois, or….?

"Yeah, Luciano. Are you alright?" Oliver asked innocently.

Luciano snarled, "Stay the fuck away from me, you beast!" he roared throwing a knife at Oliver.

Nations gasped, not knowing why Luciano was throwing a knife at the most innocent one of them.

Oliver giggled catching the knife, "Looks like someone forgot what my chosen weapon is~" the pink haired boy purred.

Allen rolled his eyes, "You're just wasting time, Luciano. Why throw a knife at Oliver, it's not like he would hurt Francois. And Oliver, don't make jokes. I'm pretty sure you don't even have a choice of weapon."

"That's where you're wrong, Al~" Oliver sang standing up and skipping over to Francois, who had passed out due to the poison in his system. "Oh, Francois~ You disappoint me~ You use to be able to withstand all of my poisoned food~" Oliver sighed, suddenly stabbing the unconscious Frenchman, "Oh well~ When you resurrect, we'll have to shape you up again~" He giggled removing the knife from Francois' dead body.

Turning to the other nations he grinned, "Today, we'll be doing things my way~" he said walking to the head of the table.

"And why the hell should we jus-" Lutz was cut off by a knife stabbing him in the back, he gasped falling on to the table in pain as his blood splattered all over him and his chair, some managing to stain the brit.

Oliver continued walking to front, some nations cowering away from him as they remembered his pirating days, "Oh, Kuro~ If you even think about pulling that katana out I'll make use of my old torture room." he smiled at the Japanese man, "I'm sure you'll be overjoyed to see it again, hmm~" he purred in a sinister voice. Kuro shivered at the memories and backed away.

Allen grabbed Oliver's right hand, which was also holding his knife, he looked at the shorter male with a glare, "Sit the fuck down Oliver, you can't just kill everyone and take over the meeting." he exclaimed sternly.

Oliver grinned at his ex-colony, "That's another dollar in the swear jar~"

Oliver swug his knife at Allen. Allen's eyes widened as he jumped out the way, the knife just grazing his arm. And so began a game of cat and mouse. Oliver chased Allen around, swinging his knife managing to cut him in various places.

"You know, Love~" Oliver sang behind Allen, "You would make lovely cupcakes~"

Allen's eyes widened, realizing that this was not the kind man he knew.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. _FUCK_! Allen had ran himself into a corner and collapsed.

Oliver looked down at his former brother as another pink ring appeared in his eyes. He grinned cruelly at the younger and raise the knife only to gasp as a syringe was stabbed into his neck, pouring a liquid into him. His eyes dragged shut and his body fell forward. Allen caught the pink haired man and looked up in shock.

The Luciano stood, huffing as he held a syringe in his hand. "Lucky I had the sedation with me this time."

Allen looked down at the knocked out man he held in his arms, "What. The. FUCK?!"

Oliver woke up in a warm bed as the moonlight shone on his face. He sat up and looked around, he was in Allen's house in America - where the meeting was held - but he didn't remember how he got here. He looked to his left as someone shuffled next to him. There Allen laid, glaring up at him. Oliver tilted his head cutely and looked into the eyes of the American.

Allen suddenly pulled Oliver down to lay on the tallers chest, "Go to sleep, It's too fucking early." he groaned.

Oliver smiled and - still confused - fell asleep again.

In the end, everyone decided not to tell the Englishman about what had happened and his stayed oblivious to the whole situation that had occurred. He stopped asking questions when he realized he'd never get any answers.

Allen had a newfound respect for the smaller but also a newfound fear of him. He realized that he _never_ wanted to mess with his former caretaker _ever_ again. **That** Oliver scared the shit out of him.

 _ **THE END**_


End file.
